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How Sweet This Is

Your Answers to “Ask Anything”!

in Blogging, Faith, Littles, Parenting on 04/27/12

Joeylee from Sweet & Sassy Girls asked:

 1. When can we expect baby #2?

Hubby and I are definitely thinking about another baby. With it taking so long to get pregnant with E, we don’t want to wait too long in case we run into complications again, however we want to make sure we are ready and that we had some good time with E by herself. We have babies on the brain though with a lot of our friends welcoming their littles into this world lately and can’t wait to experience that again! In the meantime I am working on getting healthy and preparing myself hoping not to gain another 50lbs next time around.

2. How do you discipline E?
Hubby and I decided early on that spanking was not a form of discipline we wanted to use, it just isn’t something we feel comfortable with. I don’t want discipline to come out of a place of anger, and for me I feel like spanking would be just that. And if I can get myself calmed down and E calmed down then there are other alternatives to spanking that I believe are more effective. 
So, how do we discipline? Right now it is a lot of redirecting, an occasional time-out, taking something away (consequences), and a lot of talking and A LOT of PRAISE. I am constantly building E up so that when she does something wrong there is a distinct difference in my tone. 
It’s funny because I was just talking with a friend about this the other day. I was pretty type A before having E, but I do believe that I have become more type B since becoming a mother. My child is strong willed and “spirited”, and if my type A personality takes over and forces E to do something (like come inside when we are done playing) then it will end in a huge meltdown. She wants to make her own decisions, and she doesn’t need help, according to her. The type B side of me really has to takeover and make other choices. I can either drag her inside and let the meltdown ensue for the next 10 minutes, or I can offer her another choice like “let’s go inside and play with the dogs!” to let her make the decision of coming inside. With the latter we both win.
I have given her an occasional timeout and she also gets things taken away and consequences. We do not discipline her for communicating with us, even when it drives us crazy- crying, whining, screaming. Rather than punish her, we try to find other ways for her to communicate what she needs from us, until she can tell us directly.
 
With all that being said- I am sure our style will change and adapt when we have another, but this is what works for us now.
3. If you could take a family vacation where would you go?

I think we would either go to Hawaii or Florida, granted money was no issue and E was a little older. Hubby and I have never been to Hawaii and think it would be pretty awesome and relaxing. We also both love the idea of going to theme parks in Florida, Harry Potter for sure!

Venessa for A Journey of Love asked:

What do you still want to accomplish or learn how to do?

I would LOVE to learn to play another musical instrument. I played the Viola in high school and traveled locally as well as overseas to play. It was awesome! I also love to sing. I would love to learn to play either the piano or the guitar.

I would love to get my house cleaned and organized and be able to keep it that way. I say that, because I feel like my house is always in a state a chaos. So hubby and I are going at it a room at a time to try and get things cleaned up. I need everything to have a place! I think that will help my stress levels, a lot, and definitely be an accomplishment!

What would you like to teach E as she grows up? (this one is coming from my fear of raising a daughter in this society!)

I think about this all the time. When I was at a friends baby shower one of the other guests said that all moms should create a list of personality traits or qualities that they want their child to have, the idea being that if you write it down you will be more likely to nurture those traits in your child. Here are the traits I can think of that we try to nurture in her.

We want her first and foremost to love Christ and have her own personal relationship with Him. I think that if we can nurture that and really make it number one, a lot of other traits will fall into place. We want her to be kind and respectful, I want her to be the kid that likes everyone and everyone likes, I do not want her to get swept up in the hateful popularity contest that happens to our girls in this generation. I want her to have compassion and I want her heart to hurt when others hurt. I want her to be a good sport and encourage others. I want her to have enough confidence that when others do not return the same kindness or encouragement she can brush it off, and look to her heavenly father for those things. I want her to learn that it’s ok to laugh at yourself, that not everything is embarrassing, and that moments are fleeting, to enjoy them all.

DSC_0086

We are constantly encouraging creativity in her- she loves to sing and dance, and we work really hard on trusting her and letting her take risks. I read an article once about how big of a deal it is to trust your little ones while they explore. If you are constantly hanging over their shoulder and not letting them take risks, they won’t learn to do anything on their own. So we let her make a lot of choices and let her take the lead with a lot of things she wants to do- but we are always close by watching and we would never let her do something that would put her in real harm or danger.

Thanks for asking, those were fun!

Candace and Katie- you’re answers are coming in a different post! 🙂

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6 Comments

Comments

  1. AvatarSarah says

    04.27.2012 at 11:22 am

    Great questions, and answers. Celia and I definitely have major clashes with us both having big Type A personalities. I hope it won’t be even worse as she gets older. It’s good that you’ve been able to relax a little!

    Reply
  2. AvatarKatie says

    04.27.2012 at 12:59 pm

    Great answers! I love the part about the traits you want to nurture in her. You’re a wonderful mommy. 🙂

    Reply
  3. AvatarMeg Fletcher says

    04.27.2012 at 2:48 pm

    You’re answer about what you wanted for Ellie made me cry…I want that for her too! She is a precious little girl, with a beautiful mama!

    Reply
  4. AvatarJoeylee says

    04.27.2012 at 2:59 pm

    Great answers. We don’t spank around here either. We do time outs as well.

    Reply
  5. AvatarVenessa says

    04.27.2012 at 3:03 pm

    Love this post! Thanks for answering my questions!!

    Reply
  6. Avatarthe workaholic momma says

    04.27.2012 at 5:23 pm

    Great answers!!! We too are thinking about baby #2 but really want to make sure are ready and Addie is too!!! I also find myself a little more of a “go with the flow” kind of girl since having Addie…my type-A tendencies just don’t work well with a toddler in the house;)

    Hope you guys have a wonderful weekend!!

    Reply

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I'm Stephanie- wife, mama to two beautiful little girls, blog designer and coffee lover. We throw parties, get creative, raise chickens, swim a ton, and manage to make an adventure of this little life we live.


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